4/20/2008

The last exercise of my self defense class we all took turns striking three different bags the instructors were holding with first- eye jabs, second -elbow strikes and third- knee to the groin. While doing so the rest of the class cheered on each classmate. Considering being attacked, Eli and I mused on September 11th. My memory of when I first heard is interconnected with another assault. I first heard the news from a guy in my ballet class at 9:00 am at BYU. The guy often flirted with a particular girl in our class and was friendly to everyone. In retrospect I felt a creepy edge to him but not a particularly strong feel, not one I noticed on a daily basis. About a month later he was charged with some horrific sexual crimes against a woman on campus. When we found out what he'd done the girl in my class emmanated an erie sense of disbelief and relief and confusion. I never saw him again. He was the one to break the news of 9-11 to me, an offense so boggling and ununderstandable to humanity. How could a human participate in dehuminizing and murdering others ? Similarly I am forced to contemplate this one individual in my class's capability to do a comparable destructive and dehumanizing thing to another human. A small scale example of terror and horror is the only way to swallow what happened with September 11th. At BYU a beautiful optimism is typically present, a spirit of brotherly love. We want to trust each other, to treat each other with the love and respect we all deserve but a balance of having to guard ourselves for the few tainted souls who desire ill must be in play. There must be opposiiton in all things. After the class I feel I can walk a little taller and to seek good and to not fear evil quite so much because I have both an understanding and belief in humanity as well as some tools and skills to counteract those who discard humanity.